Door's open, Cas
by gackt groupie
Summary: "I've got a week, maybe less." Dean watched as the feathers fell from Castiel's wings, the angel quietly sobbing as the last of his grace slipped from him. This is a story of how Castiel fell. Season 5! Fluff, eventual slash. Rated M for later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**I don't own Dean or Cas. They belong to the creators of Supernatural.**

_January 17, 2010_

"What do you mean, he won't come?" Dean stared incredulously at the woman in front of him. A group meeting was about to start and Castiel was expected to attend. The angel was an invaluable member, a powerful protective force for the community and an absolute haven of knowledge and strength. The older woman shrugged and bit her lip.

"He's got his door locked, and all his windows are blacked out. I told him about the meeting, said you needed to talk to him, everything. He won't answer. I can hear him moving around in there, so..I dunno. Maybe you can flush him out? You seem to have this way with him." she added hopefully. Dean sighed and rose in his seat. He patted her shoulder.

"Go start without me. We'll be there soon," he called back as he pulled on his jacket and stomped out the door.

The ground was slush beneath his feet, a week's worth of snow stomped into the dirt and mud by the villagers. Dean frowned as he rounded the corner and Castiel's hut came into view. True to the woman's word, it was completely closed off. That was unlike Cas. The angel always had his windows open no matter what weather or climate. Having them otherwise struck the angel with an severe case of claustrophobia. The hunter kicked his boots into the stairs before knocking on Cas's door.

"Cas! Come on man, it's time to go!" he called out. When he was met with silence he knocked again, harder. He jiggled uselessly against the locked doorknob.

"Cas!" he called, louder. Again, nothing. Concern began to blossom in his chest. He _banged_ on the door this time, his free hand digging into his pockets for the key he kept in case of emergencies. He was the only one in the village with a copy other than Cas himself and he guarded it zealously.

The place was a wreck. Furniture was thrown about, broken glass and papers littered the floor. It was dark inside, darker than he had ever seen the place to be. Dean heard choked sobs coming from the doorway of the bedroom.

"Cas?" Dean jolted, crossed the circular sitting room in a few strides and yanked the blanket aside that served as Castiel's bedroom door. He froze at what he saw.

Castiel stood naked with his back facing a full length mirror. He stared over his shoulder, his blue eyes wide and gazed as he stared at his wings.

Wait.

Cas had _wings._ Huge, black powerful looking wings that spread wide into the room, the tips pressed against the opposing walls. Dean's throat caught as he gazed at them. In the back of his mind he was reminded that Cas always had wings, but it was only just now that he could see them. Castiel paid him no attention as he reached over his shoulder and ran a hand over the delicate curve of his left wing. When a few small feathers dislodged themselves in between his fingers he let out a pained cry. He brought his hand back to his gaze and stared at the feathers that lay inside it. He trembled as began to quietly sob. Dean was taken back by the utter misery that seeped from the angel's very being.

"Cas?" he whispered. The man's eyes jerked up to his at the sound of his name and widened in surprise. The wings swept closed. Dean noticed a few more feathers flutter to the floor.

"Dean," he choked. Niether man spoke for the longest time before Cas added,"You can see them, can't you?" He didn't specify other than to flare his wings a little. The pain in Castiel's eyes was so utterly saw, so vulnerable and so desperate for him to say "no" that Dean considered lying to him. But after all they had been through, with Sam as the the devil's meatsuit and their allies dropping left and right, lying solved nothing. Besides, this was Cas.

Dean gave a stiff nod. Castiel looked away with a grimace to the hand that held his feathers. Dean hesitantly approached the man and put a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"What's going on, Cas?"

Castiel frowned and shook his head, then sighed.

"Do you remember what I told you in the Impala about two weeks after the apocalypse started?" he asked, his voice low. Dean thought back, scanning through his memories of the many drives he and the angel took after Sam...

He shook his head, chasing the thought from his mind. Unfortunately Cas took it as an answer and jerked away from him.

"About me _falling_, Dean?"he spat. Dean started, then realized what he did.

"Shit, sorry Cas. Yes, I remember you telling me. Why?" he asked, his hand rising, this time to grasp Cas's upper arm. The angel's eyes flinched towards the thumb that slid against his skin before returning the the green eyes full of concern.

"My grace has been steadily fading since then. This," his wings spread around them. " my wings are the last to go. The fact that you can see them proves it. This is the end for me, Dean." Cas said miserably.

"The way I am now..I've got maybe a week left. A week. Then I'll be human." As the last words left his lips his voice broke and his eyes welled with tears. He bit his lip, trying to suppress the sobs threatening to burst forth since before Dean even arrived.

"Woah Cas, hey. Hey," he soothed, pulling the guy into his arms for a tight hug. He felt a wetness on his shoulder as the angel trembled beneath his hands. Dean closed his eyes and lay his head against Cas's. He rubbed a hand up and down his spine, avoiding the fragile wings.

"It'll be alright Cas. We'll get through this. We always do."

\(o.o)/

Dean stayed with Cas for the rest of the evening, helping him clean his wrecked sitting room. Cas stayed sullen and quiet for most of the time, but after he allowed Dean to convince him into drinking with him he began to relax.

"Cheers." they clinked their fifth whiskey shot together and downed them. Dean grimaced and licked his lips, collecting the little bit of alcohol that managed to escape the glass. Castiel chuckled and gave his wings a feeble flap. Dean's eyes caught the moment. Castiel, noticing it, tilted his head with a small quirked smile.

"So," he flared the feathered appendages. "Now that you've seen them, what do you think?" he asked earnestly, with a touch of bitterness. Dean's eyes widened in slight surprise at the question before darting to the wings, surveying them. They looked battered, small bald patches peppered throughout them due to the feathers that continued to fall. On closer inspection Dean discovered that they were not black, but a dark stormy gray. The color was dull, lack luster, but the dead and dry appearance of the feathers suggested that they were not always so.

Even so, Dean could still sense that they were pure, powerful things. These weren't the wings of birds. These were the wings that carried Castiel, Angel of the Lord, friend of the Winchesters. These were the wings that had on countless occasions saved the lives of both him and his brother.

Dean gazed at the wings and the man with a look of love and adoration.

"They're beautiful." he breathed. Castiel gave a sad smile and folded them closed again.

"They didn't always look like this. You should have seen them before, they were...never mind. Thank you," he said. They settled into a heavy silence again, though the air seemed significantly lighter. After a few minutes Castiel spoke up again.

"Dean, if it's alright with you...I don't want anyone else to see me like this. My wings are very private, intimate parts of my being. They aren't meant to be seen by humans." The whole part about Dean seeing them was left unsaid. Dean was the exception to the rule. Dean would always be the exception, always be different when it came to Castiel.

Dean frowned.

"So what, you wanna hermit yourself up in here for a week?"

Castiel nodded.

"But we need you out there, Cas." his voice lowered.

"Please Dean. You must understand. I _need_ this. It's hard enough that I have to watch them die without having to endure the probing eyes and fingers of the colony as well. Please."

Dean looked up at the man and met his gaze. The angel's eyes were wide, pleading, still so astonishing in their innocence despite everything they had gone through together. The hunter scowled disapprovingly but nodded.

"Alright Cas."

(o.o)/

Dean finally left Cas around one in the morning, truthfully claiming the need for sleep. When Castiel walked him to the door and pulled him into another quick hug, Dean realized that Cas was still nude.

Since when had they gotten so comfortable together that something like that slipped his radar?

"Get some rest, okay?" Dean ruffled Cas's hair in a vaguely brotherly manner. "We'll eat breakfast after I get caught up on tonight's meeting, alright?"

Cas gave a small smile and nodded.

"Alright."

"You gonna be alright by yourself tonight?" Again, like a big brother, and again Cas nodded. Dean eyed him for a moment before finally stepping on the porch.

"Kay. Door's open if you need anything."

"I'll remember that. Thank you Dean."


	2. Chapter 2

_July 18, 2010. Dawn._

The meeting he had missed wasn't a good one. A few days ago a group of four hunters were sent out to gather supplies from a neighboring colony. They didn't know that demons had already swarmed the town and were met with an ambush. Yesterday only two returned, bloody and beaten. One of them was a young man named David, barely fourteen years old. He died shortly after they managed to get him to the medical tent. Last night's meeting consisted of the lone survivor telling his story, naming any recognizable faces and giving every shred of detail he knew. Dean sat at his desk and covered his face in his hands as he read through the transcribed meeting given to him by his lieutenant. He frowned as he flipped through he pages.

"Does he say anything about the nest? Where the head's bunking?" he didn't have high hopes. As unprepared as they had been, there was little chance that they had stayed long enough to scope the place out before hightailing it.

His lieutenant shook her head. Figures. Dean gave an unsurprised grunt and closed the folder.

"That village is our closet neighbor," she stated. "They're moving closer."

"Yeah, I know. They're like fucking hyenas. " he gruffed. The woman stared unblinking at him. In a past life a woman as cool and self-confident as her would've had him wrapped around her finger. As it was, now it just pissed him off.

"So what do we do?" she asked. "Hunt down the nest and reclaim the town?"

Dean pursed his lips thoughtfully and took a drink of whiskey. His upper lip curled slightly as the liquid burned down his throat.

"If we hurry we might be able to manage it. I'll have to talk to Cas." he responded. The woman crossed her arms and tilted her head.

"What's wrong with him anyway? This isn't like him. Hell, with the way he shadows you it's like he think he's your guardian angel or -" she started when Dean glared at her and cut her off.

"You know what Frida, why don't you shut the fuck up and mind your own business?" he snarled. Frida's mouth closed immediately, her eyes wide in shock from his sudden outburst.

"I-I'm sorry." the words were stuttered. A moment's silence passed before "Is there something between you-"

"Get out. I'll give you orders when I have them."

The woman nodded and left without another word. Dean glared after her until the door snapped shut. It was nobodies business what Cas's deal was. It was none of their business what their relationship was, whether or not Cas was human.

None. Of their. Business.

He drained the rest of his glass and pushed out his chair suddenly, the legs scraping against the floor with a loud _screech_. He tugged his jacket on and headed to Castiel.

(/o.o)/

Dean cradled two covered plates of food and the paperwork in his arms as he fished out Cas's key. He didn't bother knocking. He doubted Cas would've answered anyway since the both of them knew Dean had one. There wasn't any sign of movement inside, so Dean reasoned that Cas was still asleep. After dumping his load onto the the table he carefully pulled back the curtain to Cas's bedroom and peered inside. The angel was indeed asleep, lying face first on his bed, hugging his pillow like a lifeline. His left wing was partly flared, flapping gently. His right was pressed against the wall, so it could only twitch. Dean's heart melted at the sight and for a moment he felt his previous anger melt away. He considered leaving him there and letting him hold on to that peace for a bit longer. But this was the apocalypse. They didn't have the luxury of time.

"Cas. Wake up," Dean said gently, sitting on the bed at Cas's shoulder and shaking him. "Come on buddy. Rise and shine."

Castiel growled and turned his head in his pillow just enough to peer up at him. His eyebrows scrunched and his lips twisted into a deep frown. Add his bed head to the mix and you had a veritable diabetic coma. Dean grinned.

"Morning, Sweetheart. Come eat breakfast."

Castiel glared at him (" 'm not your sweetheart.") and slowly crawled up into a sitting position. He frowned at the mess of newly-shed feathers on the floor. Dean left him and headed towards his tiny kitchenette and started coffee. Castiel had discovered his love of caffeine shortly after he began requiring regular sleep. By the time he had the food reheated Cas was padding into the room with a pair of loose pajama pants on. Dean pushed a steaming mug of coffee at him as he plopped into the chair opposite him.

"Thanks." he grunted. They ate in silence, Dean waiting for a fully functional Castiel before he went to business. Thankfully it didn't take long before Cas began to curiously flip through the pages of the packet.

"Mm, what's the plan on this?" he asked. Dean forced himself to swallow his food before he answered.

"Um, not entirely sure yet. I mean, I've got a vague idea I guess. Frida and I both think that there's still some time left to salvage it. We need the resources Cas, and we can't just let the monsters move in on our turf. They're close enough as it is."

"So what do you need me for?" Cas scowled and arched an eyebrow. His wings gave a similar twitch. Dean shrugged.

"I thought I should come to you first, see what you thought."

Cas leaned back in his chair, only to jolt back up when his wings were suddenly pressed against the back. He cursed silently to himself.

"Dean, if I can't physically help you on your mission then I have no right advising you." he gritted.

"That's not true Cas, and you know it," Dean retorted. The angel just glowered to the side. Dean sighed.

"Look man, I understand you're upset and all-"

"No. No you don't. You cannot even _fathom_ how I feel. What this feels like." The words were biting, harsh. Dean's chest gave a little jolt. Cas leaned down and picked up a long flight feather that fluttered to the ground. He twirled it in his fingers idly.

"Chances are the head will make his nest in the weapon bunker in the center of town. It'll be difficult to get to." he said finally. Dean blinked at the mood change, then shrugged.

"'sually what happens. But this place's bunker has some pretty good sized windows, so I figured we'd make this a snipe job."

Castiel nodded thoughtfully, still twirling at the feather. Suddenly his expression changed. His eyes widened slightly and he pursed his lips. He focused on the feather with deep concentration, as if something just dawned on him. Dean arched an eyebrow.

"You alright, Cas?" The angel nodded.

"Yes. I'm fine, actually." Dean hesitated before he rose in his seat.

"Well bud, I gotta get to it then. I'll see you tonight?"

Castiel nodded, still staring intently at his feather. Dean shrugged and turned to leave. He made it to the door before-

"Dean."

"Yeah?" he turned back. Castiel had this far-away look on his face, with something of a smirk quirked in his lips. It was kind of creepy.

"If you can...bring back a prisoner, will you?

The hunter paused, surprised. Taking POW's for questioning wasn't such a rare thing, not anymore. But hearing the request come from Cas, especially with that glint in his eye...it was disconcerting.

"Uh, sure. Why?"

"I may have figured out a way to still be useful. I'm not sure though, I need to test it."

"Test it? Test what?" Blue eyes met his. They were clear and determined.

"Just trust me Dean. Please."

Dean scowled for a moment, eying the angel at the table. He hesitated for just a moment before he nodded and left.

m(o.o)m

_Later that day_

True to Cas's word, the head was bunkering in the shed at the heart of the village. Damn, and Dean recognized the woman that served as it's vessel. She had been the village doctor, an ornery old woman who had protected the village children like a crazed mother bear. He himself once witnessed the woman drive a scalpel through a demon's skull.

What a goddamn loss. A fucking waste of a good woman.

He watched the demon from his perch atop a high fir branch with a pair of high powered binoculars. It didn't have many underlings, about ten to Dean's count. This clan was a small one, which meant the head was likely an inexperienced one.. Between him and the five hunters that sat perched in surrounding trees, clearing them out would be no problem. He turned off the safety of his rifle.

"Off with the switches guys," he ordered into the walkie talkie.

"On my mark..ready...fire!"

It was like shooting fish in a barrel.

(o.o)/

They piled the unconscious bodies of the demons into a circle. Well, all apart from the one bound and gagged in the back of a covered truck. Dean closed his eyes and began to chant the exorcism, willing the demon's black bodies to spill forth from their victims and back into the Pit. They burnt the bodies in a pyre (they didn't much time to do much else) and made repellent sigils at the entrances with spray paint. They were all sweaty and dirty by the time their work was done, bittersweet emotions radiating through their souls. These were good people they had butchered today, people that just like them were struggling to survive.

Yet despite all that, today could be considered a victory. They kept the demons away from their own front front gates and had earned a multitude of new resources as well.

\(o.o)

Castiel was in a surprisingly good mood when he returned. After a few drinks, he even started to laugh. At the moment, they were playing a drinking game called quarters. The object was to flip a coin into a small glass. If you missed, you drank. If you made it, the other player drank. Dean was losing.

"Admit it Cas you're cheating," he slurred after taking yet _another_ shot. "You must have more mojo left than you think." Castiel snickered.

"I just have a keener sense of hand-eye coordination. My grace has nothing to do with it. You're just a sour loser."

"Yea, eat me." Dean grumbled and flipped the coin towards the glass. When it landed inside with a soft _clunk_ he whooped and punched the air.

"Yea! Drink it, boy!"

Castiel drained the shot like a pro, in one gulp and followed by that deep rooted growl from the burn of alcohol. A part of Dean swelled with pride, knowing that it was he that had introduced the angel to the wonders of grain alcohol. Cas giggled and grinned at him.

"Give up Dean! You're far drunker than I am. Light weight." he said smugly. Dean glared and rose in his seat.

"You got somethin' to say man? Them's fightin' words."

A glint formed in Cas's eyes and he rose as well. He held out his arms in challenge and backed into the spacious sitting room.

"Bring it then."

Cas was looking for a fight, whether it be play or real he didn't care. The alcohol had him buzzing, and with his current situation and the close vicinity of a body that would willingly indulge him, well... actions needed to be taken. He was brimming with frustrations to lance from his body and soul.

Dean recognized the bait for what is was, but stepped forward anyway. Or strutted. He wasn't going to split hairs. Within moments they were nose to nose, posturing in that testosterone saturated way that human males tended to adopt.

"Yeah?" he challenged.

"Yeah." The angel's blue eyes shined maddeningly bright. His wings flared, a blatant invitation. Dean's heart began to race.

"Come on, light weight. Let's go." Castiel growled, his voice a fraction of a decibel lower. Dean shoved him, his own smile slightly manic. Cas caught himself and returned the gesture. They pushed and shoved at each other until Castiel finally tackled the hunter, knocking the wind out of him and pinning him to the sofa.

"Son of bitch, you cheat-!" Dean gritted out as he struggled against the other man, kicking at him to dislodge the iron grip on his shirt and wrist. Neither notice the feathers that flew from their scuffle.

"I don't need to cheat!" the angel laughed, charging at him again. Dean twisted and held a foot out, tripping the angel into a face-down sprawl. Unfortunately he forgot about the wings until the left smacked him in the face with enough force to knock him to the ground as well.

"Dammit...!" Castiel laughed beside him, baring his wings to the extent that the low ceiling would allow. Dean grumbled.

"Yea rub it in you dick."

Castiel shrugged and snickered again. Dean slowly began to laugh himself. They lay next to each other and laughed for what felt like the longest time, the reasons why steadily slipping from them. At one point they both looked to each other at the same time and their eyes met. Their giggles began to die down until a heavy silence followed. They lay there on the rug, blue eyes on green, both hearts beating a pulse into the floor. Castiel reached out to Dean and placed a hand on Dean's shoulderblade, his finger wide and gentle. Dean smiled a tiny smile, nothing more than a quirk of lips. Seconds turned into minutes as the silence grew louder, the tension heavier. The pulses beating from the the two beings on the floor sped.

Then Cas leaned over to capture Dean's lips into a gentle kiss. Dean titled his head slightly and met his advance. The hand on his shoulder moved to his throat, then to cradle his face. It didn't even occur to him to stop this because like always...this was Cas. Dean had no inhibitions when it came to this angel, he never had and never would. Dean moved a hand to grip the other man's head and pulled him closer into the kiss, deepening it. Dean put everything he had into the kiss because Cas needed it. Cas did the same so that he could convey his emotions- his fear, frustration, gratitude and despair.

It accomplished what the bottle of alcohol could not and brought two hurting souls together for a beautiful moment.

(o.o)/

Dean left shortly after they broke apart, but only after the angel insisted that he get his rest. ("You've accomplished a great victory, Dean. You deserve a day to sleep in.") As soon as the lock to his front door clicked shut, the contented smile on his face fell. He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against the door and breathed.

_If you can hear me, give me strength._

Castiel quietly made his way over to the back of the bunker, behind his kitchenette to a storage closet. Inside sat the bound and gagged demon from Dean's hunt. Cas smirked smugly at it.

"Hey there."

The demon (in the body of a surly middle-aged man) glared and snarled at him, though the rag in his mouth turned his words to mush. Cas ignored him and picked up a box of his feathers from a nearby shelf. He picked up out and twirled it in his fingers. A gleam formed in his eye.

"I want to thank you for volunteering for my little test." his voice was cold, distant. The demon spat something that sounded vaguely reminiscent to 'fuck you!'. Castiel ignored him and brought the feather against the demons arm. The effect was immediate: The skin bubbled and the demon lurched in his chair, screaming around his gag.

A twisted smile split Castiel's face.


End file.
